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me and david lynch

Mar. 30th, 2008 | 11:37 am
music: suffice to say - yacht

Dear Mr. Lynch,

After this presentation in school, I will not associate with your works ever again. Or, well, maybe Twin Peaks. And maybe The Elephant Man if we ever find it again. But apart from that, nothing more ever. Understood?
the reason to this is because it's come to my attention that you never include chapters on your DVDs. I'm completely aware of the reason, but do you realize the consequences? Now I'll have to stand in front of my whole class, rewinding and forwarding like a dork all through my presentation of your works. Thank you SO much.

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me and the break up

Mar. 20th, 2008 | 05:33 pm
music: killer kaczynski - mando diao

So, I've broken up with my boyfriend, for the second and hopefully the last time. Did he understand? He didn't seem sad enough at all. On the other hand, maybe I'm not that fun anymore. But I'm handsome. VERY handsome for a girl.
So, well, I'm single now. I don't know what you do when you're single. Maybe you...do cross stitches or something else that old ladies do when they're widows. I think I'll start saying that I'm a widow, and that my husband died in the war and that I'm faithful to him until the day I die. That should keep slimy bastards off me for a while.

JOKE OF THE DAY:
Knock knock!
Who's there?

YOUR EX-GIRLFRIEND!

Yes, alcohol is very much allowed if you've been widowed.

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me and reality

Mar. 19th, 2008 | 08:30 pm
music: ca plane pour moi - plastic bertrand

If there's one thing I hate, it's writing a personal letter to a future employer. This is mostly because I have a hard time keeping serious when I'm selling out my soul. I'd much rather take it all down to a level of "I once got 4703 point in Tetris" or "I'm a ninja. It's true" and thus my future employed would realize my awesomeness and hire me just because I'm witty.

But no.

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me and smoking

Mar. 17th, 2008 | 10:24 pm
music: but i'm different now - the jam

Last night I dreamt that I was a famous artist, and by some mysterious reason I therefore had to smoke all the time. I smoked and smoked and smoked and I (despite my distaste for smoking in real life) enjoyed myself veyr much indeed. Then I met my friend Lars, a real life smoking junkie, who was mighty impressed seeing me smoke these ridiculous amounts of cigarettes and offered to buy me a packet of Cloves. In an instant, I was pissed as hell and shouted at him that he was trying to ruin my name by making me into a bloody goth.

Strange thing was that when I woke up, I was dying for a smoke. Very strange, considering that I've never smoked ever in my whole life.

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me and anime

Mar. 10th, 2008 | 10:12 pm
music: vengeance - new model army

It's been a while since I was devoted to the anime/manga scene, mostly because I thought the general selection of anime/manga complete rubbish. I can't stand the stereotypical characters and the even stereotypical stories, and I hate the cuteness, the kawaii factor. When will the Japanese stop making characters and stories just for the sake of being cute? I don't like cute series, I don't like cute and innocent characters and I loathe cute sidekicks. I know all to many people who agree to watch a crap series just because it's JAPANESE. I for one judge anime just as harshly as I judge any other TV-series. I would never have watched Twin Peaks if it had been cute and in pastels.

My anime taste is somewhere around the 90's, which makes me a dinosaur among anime geeks. In a country where something stops being hip after a week, series are made like fast food, which makes the series I actually like retro and uncool. Nowadays, I'm mostly disappointed by what I see.
This week, being sick and all, I thought I'd give two new and very popular series a chance; Lucky Star and The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya. Both of them might be among the worst series I've ever watched. Both of them are set in a school where we follow "unique" characters (one eccentric, one quiet shy-guy and one innocent cutie) in their daily life sprinkled with slapstick and humorous situations. And I can understand if you like that. But I'm looking for something more, I want a questioning of identity, philosophy, cultural references to books and idea history, a mysterious mood and a hint of doomsday.

This made the third series I watched, Serial Experiment Lain, an instant favorite. Right now, I'm curled up in front of yet another monochrome episode, feeling all cosy and content. I might be the most conservative anime fan ever, but at least I know what I like

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me and the wine

Mar. 7th, 2008 | 11:03 pm
music: whistlin' past the graveyard - tom waits

I promised I would write while drunk, so here I am. It's a bit funny actually. "Dreams", what a fucking name for a wine. "Dreams". BAH!
My brother and my friend Max are talking, that's very nice. They haven't seen each other for a while, and now they're talking about drugs and, well, wine. Perhaps my brother is a bit too decadent for his 17 years, but I think decadent is just fine. I think you should be decadent when you're his age, because I think I was even worse. I think.

Now they're talking about when Hoffman sat down on a colour-filled palette and ruined his pants, ho ho! We've read my old diary from when we were boyfriend and girlfriend and we've cried and been all "WAH WAH WE USED TO BE SO YOUNG AND NOW WE'RE ALL GROWN UP WAH WAH". Somewhat dorky, I daresay. If this was a movie, we'd be heard strings by now.

Max doesn't think that "Dreams" is a gay name for a wine. Max is therefore gay himself, and therefore blind to the obviously homosexual. That's what happens when you're a fag. My brother's friend has changed his telephone number. Now I'm going to have more wine, yum yum. Enough of this, good night everyone!

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me and kafka aster gro wictor wictoria liam cecil dale audrey snö

Mar. 3rd, 2008 | 04:25 am
music: pascal - kom ner

Once upon a time, I thought I was pregnant. Well, actually, it was last week. Since I find it incredibly selfish to pop out your own kid when there are millions of kids who need your parenting much more, the whole issue of SHIT ABORTION OR NOT WTF pretty latent.  Instead, I had a lot of fun with my friends talking about my doomed little foetus.

We started off by talking about the last time I had an abortion and when I thought it would be amusing for the little blob to make a sort of danse macabre, so when I was wiping it away with toilet paper, I shook it gently so that the little piece of human Jell-O was jiggling about in a happy fashion. Now we speculated whether you could save the embryo somehow, perhaps in a jar or something like that. Then we sat and laughed about how funny it would be if you lived completely ignorant of the fact that your child in fact was nothing more than some slime in a jar. Imagine this scenario:

"Hello doctor. Yes, why yes that's me. Anna? Well, she's three months old. How tall? Hm...With or without jar?"

At a later occasion, I got a magazine for pregnant women from a friend, where we indulged in a Daddy Horoscope, yoga for pregnancies and what you should eat to keep your health. We also thought about names for the baby (the result can be seen in the title), and the whole thing culminated when I thought that what if I got a treasure chest for my little darling. THAT, if anything would show my love for my little baby, a treasure chest for my little treasure.

Sometimes I think my uterus is wasted on me.

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me and the evil company

Feb. 21st, 2008 | 08:31 pm
music: carnival - the pillows

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me and blogging

Feb. 18th, 2008 | 09:16 pm
music: walk away - sisters of mercy

I admit it, I hate blogging. Blogging is overrated, blogging is rather pretentious and blogging is more than often a very non-constructive activity. Sure, everyone should be allowed to write and say anything they want because everyone's got something to say, yadda yadda. But come on. A blog. Just listen to the word. It says "Hello, I'm a hipster girl with too many friends on MySpace and too few friends in real life". It whispers "Hi, I'm a cool mom who's got something to say to the world because I've had a baby, so I know what I'm talking about". And it points out that "Hello there, my name is Bob and when I watched E! I heard that everyone blogs nowadays. By the way, what's HTML?!

OK, so it's not that bad. Right now MY blogging is mostly about me keeping up my fantastic English and me keeping up writing. I have to work the goods and keep on doing what I like and what I'm good at. From what I've heard, I'm supposed to be rather amusing. Besides, I can't stop. Perhaps I simply hope that my blogging will make me the King of Internet, a wish that at its best is naively cute.

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